Eye of the Beholder. chap 2.

Tori got out of her car, anxiously staring at the intimidating building in front of her.

"God, Jade," she thought exasperatedly. "Why here?"

The brunette had been following her psychotic girlfriend for some time. Not too far to lose her, but also not too close to be seen. After all, she knew the challenges of dating Jade West as well as the dangers that came with angering an already pissed off lover.

Needless to say that Tori was walking on thin ice, but she just couldn't help it. An angered Jade always made things more difficult for bygones to be bygones, but that never stopped the half-Latina before and it wasn't going to start now.

After all, the Goth was no picnic, but the rewards that came with melting the ice were far too great to give up.

"I'm not done with you Jade," Tori muttered. "I will figure you out."

Once she parked her car, the tanned girl couldn't help but asked herself in dismay, "Now how am I going to get inside?"

At one point in their relationship, she remembered that Jade tried to loosen her up and invited her to get some drinks, but of course, Tori had to protest and tell her stubborn girlfriend that they were under the legal age.

Unsurprisingly, Jade had a solution for that; one that made Tori extremely agitated.

"Fake ID's Vega, fake ID's," she slyly said.

Her devious smirk gracefully appeared over the Latina's closed eyes.

"What's life without some risks Vega?"

Tori couldn't help but groan. That annoying question always popped up in her mind at the worst of times.

Always.

"At this moment, I wish I had gone through with it," she kicked herself mentally. "Jade knew I would never get one, that's why she's inside. That bouncer is my only obstacle, but I came all this way and I'm not about to stop now! Consequences be damned!"

"I said get out!"

"AAAAHHHHH!"

"OH MY GOD!" Tori got out of the way the nick of time as someone hits the dumpster's door.

"Oh my Squeedly-Spooch," Zim groaned in pain as he slowly slided inside the dumpster. "Ack! The smell!"

The bouncer clapped twice as if congratulating himself on a job well done. "No ID, no entry."

Tori gulped. "Guess, getting in will be harder than I thought."

"Stupid human," Zim hissed. "I swear, when I conquer this pitiful planet, I'll personally make sure the moose eat nuts in front of him!"

"Are you ok?"

"Eh, what?"

"I said, are you ok?" Tori repeated worriedly. "Do you need any help?"

To empathize her point, she stretched her arm to help out the Invader out of the dumpster.

The Irken however, rudely swiped the girl's hand away. "I don't need any assistance!"

Zim tried to get out, only to made a fool of himself by stepping on a banana peel and unceremoniously hit the cold, hard pavement.

"I meant to do that."

Tori stared dumbfounded at the other "teen". "Now, do you need some help?"

"NEVER!"

"Chiz, don't do that!" the brunette said as she jigged her finger inside her ear. "You almost made me deaf."

"Inferior human organs," Zim snickered evilly. "But what can I expect from such a pitiful species?"

Tori didn't hear the alien's demeaning comment as she was too busy trying to get rid of the ringing in her ear. She did, however, notice something odd about the guy in front of him. His irises were a dark purple, his hair resembled that of Elvis, somehow he lacked ears and a nose, but his biggest characteristic was that...

"Are you... are you green?"

"I'm merely a human worm baby with a skin condition!"

"Ok, sorry!" Tori said, raising her eyes in mock surrender. "No need to tear my head off"

"I did not do such a thing!" Zim growled, but began to think as his face grew maliciously disturbing. "But I wonder…? I do have the equipment to achieve just that with minimal effort, not to mention it can be very painful for the subject."

The Irken chuckles evilly, which quickly turn into laughs. He laughs so hard that his eyes start to water. Tori, as well an onlookers began to look at Zim as if he were an unstable maniac, which wasn't that far from the truth. Zim stops laughing once he notices people are staring at him.

"Ahem." He grabs a random guy by his shirt collar and pulls him near him. "I love Earth!"

"Let go of me you freakshow!"

The man punched Zim in the gut, which of course cause him to let the human go in pain. However, the passerby didn't stop there and hit him in the face.

"Oof! Ah! My Squeedly Spooch! My face! My superior face!"

"Freak," the man sneered as he walked away, leaving the disguised Invader convulsing in pain.

"Hey you!" Tori yelled out indignantly. "You can't do that!"

"Says who? You?"

The Half-Latina narrowed her eyes. "Yes, me. Now apologise to, um..."

"ZIM!"

"Yeah, Zim," she said at once. "Just because he's a little odd, it doesn't mean it gives you the right to punch him."

"And if I don't apologise to the loser?" He challenged smugly.

"Ever heard of Jade West?" Tori asked the stranger evenly.

Suddenly his face became one frozen in fear. "No...no."

"Something tells me you have," the girl said. "She's my girlfriend. Let me tell you, when I'm not happy, she isn't happy, which of course will make you very unhappy for a very long time."

At hearing such menacing words, the passerby quickly helped up Zim to his feet as well as cleaning some imaginary durst from his Invader uniform.

"Sorry about that buddy," he said fearfully. "I gotta go now... I think I hear my dog howling."

The man then ran away screaming, "FEAR THE WICKED WITCH OF THE WEST!"

Zim raised an invisible eyebrow at the human's show of cowardice. "Fascinating, I've only seen these kind of antics when the Gaz-Beast promises to doom her victims."

"I'm sorry, Gaz-Beast?"

The Invader turned to face the Half-Latina, a look if distaste graced his features. "Possibly the only Earth-Monkey on this horrible planet who I tolerate. Maybe even love as you humans say."

"That's... Sweet?" Tori said unsurely.

"Yes, yes I'm the master of love!" Zim answered distractedly. "Now, go away. I must devise an ingenious plan to get inside. My scary human-pig-smelly lover is inside, no doubt in an attempt to make me jealous, but she won't succeed.YOU HEAR ME LITTLE GAZ!"

"Shut up you jerk!" Several people on the other side waiting to get inside bellowed out at the same time.

"I will destroy them," the Irken growled evilly. "But that will have to wait, I got more pressing matters at hand."

"Look, um, Zim is it?" Tori said slowly. "I know it's not my place to say anything, but aren't you overreacting? I mean, maybe your girlfriend just wants a little time to herself?"

Zim turned to face his unlike companion. "You're still here?"

"Uh... Yeah," Tori says, irritated. "Did you even listened to a word I said?"

"Nope," he replied back. "All I heard was blah blah blah."

"You know what?" Tori snapped, "Those guys are right, you are a jerk."

"If I'm such a jerk, then explain to me why I have a love-pig while you are all by yourself?" Zim challenges with a smirk.

"As as matter of fact, the reason why I'm here, it's because my girlfriend is inside that building!" The Half-Latina shot back as she pointed at the karaoke bar. "She ditched me a while ago and I wasn't about to let her escape without talking things out!"

"Yes, yes you're terrible, blah blah, I didn't ask for your life's story!"

"But you just-you told me- why you know what? Forget it," Tori said exasperatedly. "Do whatever you want, I'm going to find some way inside."

"Good luck," Zim sneered, loud and insincere. "The only way inside other than the front door in the ventilation vent."

Tori stopped in her tracks. "And you know this how?"

The Irken hid his Irken notepad, which showed the schematics of the bar, out the girl's field of vision. "I just know!" He hissed. "I'm amazing like that!"

The Half-Latina gazed suspiciously at the green teen; then at the building on the other side. She was desperate to get inside and find Jade, so her desire to see her girlfriend won over her moral side.

It resulted in something she have not ever done before.

Blackmail.

"Ok, Zim. Here's the thing, my girlfriend is inside that same building you want to enter."

"And I care because?"

"Because if you don't take me with you, then I'll rat you out!"

The alien began to shake violently. "You're blackmailing me?!"

"Yeah, guess that would be the..."

"ARE YOU BLACKMAILING ME?!"

"I just told you that..."

"ARE YOU BLACKMAILING ME?!"

"YES I AM!" Tori exploded. "Damn, you have some serious listening problems."

"ARE YOU?!"

Tori simply shakes her head."It's like dealing with a mixture of Jade and Cat, my god how did this guy get a girlfriend?!"

Zim narrowed his eyes hatefully. "Fine. Come along you she-beast, my Gaz-love is waiting!"

"Ok, rule number two, I would appreciate it if you didn't call me a beast!" Tori commented as she followed the disguised alien, who was goose stepping over to where she assumed was the ventilation vent.

Both the Irken and the human made their way towards the alley, but discretely as to not be noticed by walkers. The last thing they needed was for their mission to end before it began.

They found the air vent above crates which are stacked into a perfect staircase.

"Isn't that a bit, oh I don't know... Suspicious?" Tori asked.

"Not at all!" Zim boasted, "I put them there as a backup plan in case my ingenious first plan wasn't successful."

"Which of course, wasn't the case," Tori noted dryly. "Your smell makes it obvious."

"Shut up and follow me!" He ordered. "Your noise tube annoys me."

"Hey! Shouldn't it be ladies first?!"

"Do you have the knowledge to get inside, not get lost, being quiet when rats as well as other old dead things come our way?" Zim questioned sadistically. "If so, so ahead human."

"Ok fine, you can go first," the Half-Latina conceded, shivering in disgust. "And my name isn't human, it's Tori!"

"Humans and their ugly names that make no sense," he muttered under his breath as he got inside. Tori soon followed.

"Hey, I happen to think my name is nice!"

"You would think that"

Several hours later, the unlikely duo were still crawling around the vents.

"We're lost."

"We are not lost!" Zim growled, "I know exactly where we are!"

"Which is?"

The alien looked from the space on the nearby vent, noticing a toilet. "I believe we're in the kitchen."

"Let me see."

Zim grudgingly moved away so Tori could take a look, which wasn't easy considering how cramped their space was. "Eww gross!" She shouted in disgust. "This isn't the kitchen, it's the men's bathroom!"

"Are you sure?"

Tori looked at the alien as if he were a moron. "Yes I'm sure!" She snapped, "Kitchens don't have toilets, much less someone taking a dump on it!"

"Mine does."

"That is are seriously weird and disgusting," Tori said crossly. "How is it that someone as narcissistic as you get a girlfriend?"

"I'm amazing, that's why!" Zim answered, not realizing he was being insulted.

"Why did I choose to follow you?" Tori asked herself regrettably.

"Because you wanted to see your pathetic love-pig," Zim replied indifferently. "Which of course can't hold a Gasquiggasplorch to my scary Gaz-Beast!"

The Half-Latina narrowed her eyes, anger gracing over her once calm face. "What did you say?"

"I said, my Gaz-Beast is better than your mate," Zim bellowed proudly. "To give you an example of her greatness, she once doomed some ugly gamer stink-beast for stealing her Game Slave device by following him around until he cracked like an egg!"

"She sounds like an amateur," Tori comments unimpressed. "My Jade was capable of scaring the entire school using only her voice and a megaphone."

Zim huffed indifferently, "Can your girlfriend scare an entire planet with nothing but her evil eye?"

"I'm sure she could!" Tori snarled, not noticing that the alien wasn't specifying which world he was talking about.

"Can your pitiful girl remove limbs using only two chopsticks?!" He asked. "Huh? Huh?! Huh?!"

"That's nothing!" Tori dismissed. "Jade once stole my blood and got away with it!"

"So? Little Gaz once tried to destroy the Earth using two cans of beans!"

"That doesn't even make any sense!"

"Her irrationality is what makes her dangerous!" Zim screamed. "And all the more endearing. Gaz destroyed public property with a spaceship-I mean a car; she escaped from her father's laboratory; she broke into the membrane filming studio and a giant hot dog stand; she also stole an earth vehicle and drove it semi-destroyed to a hill! Not to mention causing deep psychological trauma to humans that angered her to no end. I bet that your Jade-drone can't achieve that kind of destruction and illegal activities!"

"I'm sure she could!" Tori snapped. "I just don't want her to go to jail"

"So you hold her back then?"

"No!" She denied. "I support anything she does, I simply interfere when her actions can be self-destructive, there's a freaking difference!"

"My Gaz-Beast has a hatred for the human race and I support such a thing!"

"That's the only thing she hates?"

"Top that Tori-devil thingy!"

"Oh I will," The tanned girl said as she snaps her neck in preparation. "Aside from people, she hates making video captions; when idiots say 'supposably' rather than 'supposedly'; 'fustrated' rather than 'frustrated'; and when dogs jump up on her and the owner says, 'Oh, it's OK! He's friendly!'"

"That's it?"

"I'm just getting started." Tori smirked deviously. "She also hates people who put ketchup on hot dogs; when a waiter at some restaurant brings dessert without first cleaning the dirty dinner dishes; when people complain about her chewing ice loudly; when people say 'Have a nice day!'; and what fish smells like on a hot summer day! She really hates when boys ask her, 'Can I kiss you?' I also hate that, don't they know she's taken?!"

"Humans don't exactly have respect for others property," Zim agreed, remembering when that Iggins tried to sway Gaz to leave him for a "real" man.

"Jade also hates the word 'moist', the word 'tissue'; when someone says "moist tissue" together; the number 9"

"Why?"

Tori shrugs, "Because she thinks it sounds whiny"

"You humans and your inferior numbering system."

"Anyway, Jade also happens to hate the noise made when the tongue smacks the roof of the mouth; movies where a group of kids work together to overcome evil and save the world-"

"-Ah yes, saving the Earth, what a waste of time," the alien agreed. "Unless it can be saved in order to be destroyed later by someone-other than me," Zim said evasively. "Someone that will ensure this pitiful species is enslaved under a greater, more magnificent one!"

Tori stared at him for a second. "You done?"

"Aren't you?"

"Tsk, tsk, tsk, we haven't even started," she said smugly. "Jade also has a strong hate for bras that hook in the front…"

"...And after trying to get them off of me, I do too," She thought to herself.

"She also hates the words panties, ducks; when she is at a restaurant and the shrimps have tails; picking off shrimp tails, video captions that ruin what the video is all about. And birthday parties or birthdays in general, that Santa won't go to a gym to lose weight. Aloe vera, guys who bite their lower lip while they dance; girls who have irritating laughs; when you fall off a ladder then land on a small dog; and the dog pukes on you, milk flowers, lullabies, babies, the month October, the color pink, the Sun, allergies." Tori pauses. "People who dress their dogs in Halloween costumes; people who dress their dogs every day, Christmas; people who sing Christmas carols before December."

Tori took a deep breath before continuing with her list. "She also hates being soaking wet in her clothes, when people sit in her chair. She also hates my sister Trina, parades, talking to a camera, when you go to a restaurant and what you're wearing matches the waitress' uniform. People who sit on the beach for hours to wait for the sunrise, wire hangers, walking, being stuck in traffic, raisins, the Middle Ages, middle schoolers, Wisconsin. When people say 'everything happens for a reason'. But the thing she hates the most is when small minded bigots get between us!"

The Irken whistled once the young girl was done. "That's a lot of hate." Zim was somewhat impressed.

"Told you so," Tori said victoriously.

"But she still can't doom vermin."

"I had just about enough of your derogatory-"

But she never finished her sentence since a very loud crack interrupted her.

"Uh oh."

The floor beneath them broke. The two of them screamed as they fell directly into two different bathroom stalls.

"Oh my head!"

"Why is everything on this horrible planet hell bent on harming my squeedly Spooch!"

Zim and Tori slowly sat up from the debris they caused and walked directly towards the bathroom door.

"Ouch, anybody there?" Robbie asked in distress "Hello? I'm in pain!"

"Join the club buster" Dib warily croaked from beneath the wall that collapsed on him "When will learn that spying on my sister will cause me nothing but horrible suffering?"

Once the two were outside the restrooms, trying to look as nonchalant as possible, they began to search for their respective girlfriends. It was kind of hard to do since they were covered in dust from the debris.

"Where are you Jade?"

"Gaz has to be here! The Voot Cruiser tracking device can't be malfunctioning."

After about ten seconds, Tori squealed happily. "She's over there!"

Zim followed suit, noticing that his scary purple headed lover was not too far from a similarly dressed female.

"Ah, so is my love-weasel!"

"JADE!"

"GAZ-BEAST!"

The disguised Irken Invader and the half-Latina made their way towards their respective girlfriends, all the while remembering fondly the discussion of who of the two scary girl was more attractive.

"Jade may be a woman with deep psychological problems, but she's mine... So dark and yet so very beautiful."

"Gaz may have the to doom me without so much as a second thought, but instead she's going to help me destroy this horrible planet, my very evil mate... So very above the rest of these hideous Earth monkeys."